My first ultrasound

"IS IT A BOY?" In order to get a Z visa, you must have a medcal examination, which includes blood tests, an x-ray, and an ultrasound, among other things. For the first time in my life, I felt like I was being processed...like a piece of meat. The system put together by this hospital puts the Toyota manufacturing process to shame. Patients, or perhaps drones, were moved in and out of the inspection stations with cold-hearted efficiency. One of my last stops in the processing line was the ultrasound station. Without looking at her next nervous drone, the inspector sternly slapped her hand on the table, signaling me to recline for inspection. SQUIRT. Out came the cold gel onto my hairy stomach, a sight to which she was probably not accustomed. "Is it boy or a girl," I asked her in jest. No reply. Now, if having an ultrasound wasn't awkward enough, this only added to the fun. She moved the device across my belly and over the side of my ribcage, which made me laugh. Was this her idea of fun? Toying with her drone before it was sent to the retail stores? In the end, it turns out I'm not pregnant.